Body Shaming – Being Fat and Fabulous
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Style File - Posted on
We at plus size garments aim to inspire and educate people around the world about loving their bodies, develop their personal styles and increase their confidence. Body Shaming of plus size men is one of the issue.
BODY SHAMING – WHY WE DON’T TALK ABOUT IT AND WHAT WE CAN DO
There is a male body shaming that men tend to underestimate,not considering it a problem, burying the discomfort with defense mechanisms
The action of insulting or negatively labeling a person based on his physical appearance is called Body Shaming. Women are often affected by this: it is easy for men (and unfortunately sometimes also for other women) to judge the size of the lips, breasts and in general the body of women, without paying any attention to the feeling of that person forall these unsolicited judgments.
But there is also a male body shaming (when it comes to negative things we like to copy women!) that has an equally negative power and probably equally widespread. But we talked about it less. Men tend to underestimate it by burying the discomfort with defense mechanisms.
Why don’t we talk about plus size male body shaming?
Unfortunately the victims (men) are not yet able to talk about it because they don’t identify it as a problem. But (most of the times) they are not the ones to blame.
We have grown in a society where the concepts of “machismo” and (toxic) “masculinity” are so deeply rooted in culture and education that every outburst is seen as natural development of things. We don’t ask ourselves why we need to become “big and strong”, to change the shape of our body, to have to show out fuzz. We do it because it is so.
Furthermore, the attempt to tackle the issue opens the door to the “sweeping” of man to other’s eyes. The prohibition against expressing a weakness, a vulnerability of our own body is born because it would be “like sissies”. So we tend to hide and avoid speech.
The peculiarities of the male body shaming
Just because the male and female bodies are different, the way to hit and negativize the male body is also different. The most common criticisms concern, as for women, the body or parts of it (pectorals, abdominals, thighs), but often also concern height, hair, hairiness.
There are men who feel uncomfortable about their thinness or for a fat body or for the “beer belly”. And they are struggling to take off their shirts (especially at the seaside in summer). There are boys who suffer from comments on their stature because their partner is taller. The anxiety during teen age due to the appearance of the beard. The judgment of not being muscle (and therefore strong). The struggle of old men to accept themselves for their “excessive” hair. Or those who start losing hair and have to hide it.
What we can all do together against the male body shaming of plus size men
Apart from talking about it openly (and in this, women very often do it more than men .. thank you!), it is important to create places – even virtual ones -where men can feel free to talk about their bodies, the discomforts they have about it and actively decide whether to accept what you are or begin a path of transformation (start on one’s own and not from a complacency of others!).
Only in this way could we educate ourselves (but above all other people) to get out of the “definition” of what a man is or should be and find each his own special way of expressing and telling himself.
As a fat person, I am no stranger to encountering people who think that they have some right to police my body. Like many fat people, I’ve heard on more than one occasion comments along the line of “oh, but what about your health?”. We are all aware that as a complete stranger these people don’t actually care about my health. They are what is known as a ‘concern troll’. They make comments like these without actually caring about the answer, and obviously you can not tell the state of someone’s health by judging them on their fatness. Essentially wanting to put someone down for their appearance – this is bullying and it’s not okay.
If you are still unsure, please bear this in mind: my body is my business. I do not owe it to anyone else to look a certain way.
Conclusion
This is a subject that we at plus size garments could speak about for hours, but in the interest of keeping things short and simple, here are some points to take away:
- You can not tell the state of someone’s health by how fat they are.
- Fat does not necessarily mean unhealthy. There are healthy fat people and unhealthy fat people, just as there are healthy thin people and unhealthy thin people.
- Another person’s health and body are none of your business unless they ask your advice/opinion.
What we are saying is that everyone should love themselves and their bodies, and feel free to wear anything they choose. At plus size garments we believe this is true whether you are a size S or a size 5XL, we just happen to be fat and fabulous!
Would like people to love themselves as they are now. To stop putting their lives off until they’re thinner, the number on the scale is a smaller one, or they have toned their “bingo wings”. If you want to tone up, lose weight, change your hairstyle or whatever, that’s fine – but love yourself while you do it (and for goodness sake, don’t feel that you should change yourself because of bullshit societal pressure and so-called “beauty standards”!).
We think this is pretty self explanatory, but we are sure there are some people who won’t get it. But you know what? That’s their problem, not ours.
Love, Care & Pamper yourself, as you are very special.
I hope this article was helpful. Shop plus size clothing in t-shirts, shirts, denims, lowers in XXL 2XL XXXL 3XL XXXXL 4XL XXXXXL 5XL 6XL 7XL at plus size garments.
